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Mom: why is everything on the floor?
Me: gravity mom





journalism matters

This post must never end.

(Source: all-of-merlins-little-things, via vanilllabear)


*skips tutorial* how the fuck do you play this game

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(via thegreatgoldenbabe)



when we were babies my dad was a stay-at-home dad while my mom kicked ass in the courtroom but he would carry my twin brother and me around with one baby on the front and one on his back in backpacks

and women would come up and look at how cute i was and coo over me and be like “awww how cute wow”

and my dad would be like, “YOU KNOW WHAT’S CUTER THAN ONE BABY”

and then he’d spin around

and BAM

there was my brother

I love everything about this. 

(Source: jon-snow, via kelseajbaker93)


You Don’t See That Every Day (18 Pics)

me @ French restaurant


Bon jer. I will have crem brool

(Source: imreallycoolandfriendly, via returntohorrorhigh)


you:  goes to the apple store to get an iphone6

me:  goes to the grocery and buys 6 apples and takes them home and eats them all in a row while standing in my driveway staring at all the cars that drive by.  i juggle them occasionally but they fall a lot and i eat the driveway apples anyway.  goodbye

(via returntohorrorhigh)

(Source: honeybooavenue, via kanderpants)